Thanx

Terima kasih untuk kamu, kerana mengajar aku erti cinta.
-end of love story-

everything turns 180deg

urghhh.. i dunnoe how to put all of these words yg keep menari-nari inside my head into sentences. *sigh* tu, la... org tua-tua slalu ckp; 'jgn happi sgt, nnt ade la yg akan jd xkene tu'.. (kan da btol-_-") cane ni.. cane ni.. rase bersalah amat. but, i dunnoe why i keep feels like dis. rase cm i'd stole sumthing from sum1. iskk.. bersalahnyee~ and i feel like d thing i've now isn't mine. *sigh*sigh*sigh*

shud or shudn't i return dat thing? or juz appreciate it as long as it is mine b4 d owner come and take it back? adakah dia akan kembali? i dunnoe... *sighhhhhhh!!*

oohhh, heppp!!
heppp!!

MCQ:
wut shud i do?
a) giv back d thing to d owner
b) act like nothing happen
c) juz wait n see
d) none of d above (state why if u choose dis ans)

unstable mode

haih...
pening + serabut
aku ke y bersalah ek?
"hope u're happi for wut u've done"
OMG... siyesly, i dun understand wut xtually happened in
my lyf lately nih.
rilly need my abg rite now.. sedey sgt. tp, that's not possible. die da blk da pon.. :(
i dun noe how to control myself.. i rilly dun noe!
i wish i neva had dis feeling...
i could only wish, i guess. coz' d feeling already developed itself..
haih~
/me away mencari ketenangan...

sekuntum bunga

di balik reranting dan kayu kayan yg begitu semak, terselit sebatang pokok. pokok mawar nama nya. tidak berbunga atau berkumbang, dek terlindung drpd segala zat nutrisi. alkisah, dtg lah seorg pekebun. dan dia duduk berehat di atas kayu kyan yg selama ini menghalang si pokok mendapatkan nutrisi. ketika berehat-rehat, si pekebun ini memerhati ke seluruh kawasan itu. akhirnya, pandangan dia tertumpu pada sebatang pokok mawar t'sebut. hairan tidak t'kata. jgnkan bunga, sekuntum kudup pon tidak menonjolkan diri masing2.

berfikir dia sebentar. lantas tanpa lengah dia mengeluarkan parang dan terus membersihkan kawasan itu. dalam sekelip mata sahaja, kawasan yg td nya semak, kini bersih sudah. akalnya berfikir.. cukup lah untuk sang pokok mendapatkan nutrisi nya tanpa dihalang oleh semak2 itu. saban hari, si pekebun dtg menjengah sang pokok.. di siram nya si pokok mawar, di baja nya si pokok mawar, di racun nya segala makhluk perosak yg ingin merosakkan si pokok mawar... dan di cantas nya semua parasit2 yg cuba untuk memusnahkan si pokok mawar.

hari demi hari berlalu. berkat keprihatinan dan kegigihan pekebun tersebut, suatu hari si pokok mawar mula mengeluarkan kudup nya. makin hari makin memekar ia. tetapi.. di sangka panas hingga ke petang. rupanya hujan di tengahari. si pokok mawar yg ditunggu bunga nya, tiba2 hampir-hampir di hancurkan oleh kaki-kaki manusia yg sibuk berlarian tanpa mengendahkan kehadirannya. mujur... si pekebun cepat smpai. sedaya upaya dia cuba untuk menyelamatkan si pokok mawar. kudup2 yg kian memekar masih lagi boleh di selamatkan.. :)

cuma.. apa yg dirisaukan, bolehkah kudup2 itu terus mekar mewangi tanpa penjagaan si pekebun? adakah pekebun mampu menghalang anasir-anasir luar drpd menghapuskan si bunga mawar? apakah yg perlu di lakukan oleh si pekebun andai suatu hari nnt kejadian yg sama berulang kembali? bagaimanakah nasib si bunga mawar? mampukah duri yg merintik mengawal sang kuntum dprd kejadian sebegitu? ohh.. nasib si bunga mawar~

p/s: jgn cuba untuk memahami isi kandungan post ini. thanx!

Hanya kau yg mampu

one sided love... *sigh*
I just keep all those feeling silently. after all, I have nobody to tell 'bout dis feeling. to him?? I dun think so, b'coz at d 1st place lyk I said b4 this is one sided love (+ malu beb...). hardly I tried to remember how this feeling started to develop itself. I'm just clueless... haih~

and suddenly I realized that I miss him alot, and alwiz waiting for him to on9. I dun really know what actually happened in my life currently. lately, I alwiz wake up early in d morning (5 a.m). reason?? juz waiting for his gtalk status to become green and hoping he'll pm-ing me. -_-" (gila aku ini..) *sigh* I kept viewing his profile... I kept thinking bout him: without fail! huhu and b'coz of him, I alwiz rejected other guys who's asked me to went out w/ them. my lyf is completely change..a lotttttttttttt!

*sigh* again? I dun like dis feeling. I hope one day it can vanished itself and i can move out and I can escape from dis feeling. perhaps... coz i noe, he'll never be mine. or there is a hope?? ntah,laa...

Ya, Allah ya Tuhanku. Engkau yg Maha Berkuasa lagi Maha Mengetahui. berikanlah sedikit petunjuk kepada diriku. Bebaskanlah aku daripada segala belenggu rasa ini. sesungguh nya, tidak tertahan lagi aku menanggung sakit ini. Andai dia bukan untukku, Engkau jauhkanlah dia daripada hidupku. Tetapi, jika sebaliknya.. Alhamdulillah. Hanya kepada-Mu aku mampu berserah. Ameen~

sedey

nuthing to say..juz rase sedey :(
after dis, no more smile.. no more words..
i just dun want to say anything to him..
no more hang out together.. if ade pon, juz ignore him..
anggap je die tade.
aku tau, sape la aku ni di mata dia.
aku faham..
i'll be stay away from ur lyf..
dun wory, dear fren..
no more disturbing from me..
sayonara...

tHe cHrOnOlOgY oF...lOvE?

the chronology... T_T

Look at the above pics. hurm, it is how my love relationship goes? nahh~~ i hope there is a best way it shud goes. but wut can i do??
when i found love, i hope i can touch it... i can feel it.. i can be honest to it... and the most important thing is i truly love him in a right way. but that never happen in my lyf [i dunnoe if it was happened in my lyf but then, i juz not realize it??] . isk~~so sad maa... :`( maybe i just not found my true love yet.hmmm, maybe...~ i think there is something that i did which is not met the expectation. hmmm, in term of wut eh?? is it my 'amal'? or i put less effort on it [err, wut i mean is on my relationship]?? or maybe it is just myself who are not committed with it??? or the way i handling my relationship was not correct?? or he was not mine??

haih...dunnoe lah. i can't think properly rite now. wut i know is i want touching the feel of the true love without having doubt towards him. seronok je when looks at others couple who are enjoying their relationship. i know, in each of the ralationship there must be what we called spices of love. what can we define as spices of love?? in my point of view, the spices of love: argument, jealousy, or some problem which can cause the couple 'gado2'. when we fights or argues with our loves one, it can increase ur syg. but, we must remember, jgn la alwiz gado laks. kene la syg2 selalu.. (eceyh~~cm dr. LOVE laks.ngeh3;P)

haih..when i can found my true love?? or i already found it, but in other hand i'm not appreciate him in a right way?oh, God..please help me. i hope one day i could find someone who are really love me and so do i. aminn..~

-Chronology Off-